How To Master Your Mind
At key moments we must be able to reach our maximum concentration, but if we are not prepared, the ideas in our minds will seem like a swarm of bees and focusing on something will be impossible.
It is not innovative to say that people with higher concentration are more productive and this gives them more chances of achieving success.
Daniel Goleman, professor of psychology at Harvard University and author of the bestseller titled Emotional Intelligence (over 5 million copies have been sold and has been translated into more than 30 languages), shares his point of view on this matter.
For Goleman, the mind is similar to the body because they can be trained. A bodybuilder’s body is proof of what can be achieved through practice;
Like the mind of a Buddhist monk, it is the result of what can be achieved through meditation.
The idea lies in being able to put our attention where, when and for how long we want.
Different thoughts (generally negative and that make us lose concentration) take over our mind; and even much in these times where technology has become the number 1 distractor.
Some of those thoughts all they do are attack our productivity and to the extent that we do nothing to get them out of there, or to attack the cause that is generating them.
For Goleman, instead of having the thought there without doing anything positive, we should go from “rumbling” to “reflecting positively” and doing RSF (Relentless solution focus).
What is it? Eliminate negative thinking by executing consecutive simple actions.
Negative thinking, which can last in our heads for days, usually comes from a problem that is not easily solved.
The common mistake is to waste time thinking about a definitive solution when what we can do is think of just one simple action that we can take to start attacking the problem.
Eventually, it won’t kill the root problem, but it will start to release pressure and make the problem lose ground in our mind. Thus we can execute successively, action by action, with the aim of eradicating the negative thought that clouds our concentration and retaking it completely.
Why Do We Think Negative Thoughts
But why do we sit down to the need to think of something negative? For Goleman, we are weak against impulses. If an email arrives with bad news, our reactions of rage, helplessness or despair are the first thing we show.
Because it is easier for us to give in to the immediate than to have the willpower necessary to think about what may come next.
In 1940 the psychologist Walter Mischel and his colleagues carried out an experiment, in which an adult entered a room with a child where there was a plate with a marshmallow and gave him 2 options: The adult had to leave the room and if the boy hadn’t eaten the marshmallow by the time he got back, he’d give him another.
If the children wanted to pass the test, they had to understand delayed gratification.
What Is Delayed Gratification?
Simply put, it is the ability to resist an immediate reward, to later receive a better reward.
With the test you saw earlier, they tested children’s will power and their ability to understand delayed gratification.
That is, they could enjoy more marshmallows in exchange for a little patience. This did not only serve to laugh at seeing the children make the most difficult decision of their lives up to that moment…
Years later, when they followed the participants, they found that those who chose to wait and eat two marshmallows scored better; they had greater planning skills; they managed stress better; they performed better in frustrating situations, and they had higher levels of concentration.
If you are able to master your mind and mix with negative people, it is still bad for your success.
That is the reason you should know the set of people you don’t need in your life.
4 types of people you must take away from your life to succeed.
There is a wide variety of personalities in the business world. Many of them with which you feel affinity and others that do not, however, are always around us, affecting us positively or negatively. They live among us and many times we accept them unconsciously, without asking ourselves if they suit us to fulfill our purposes.
There are people who constantly talk about themselves, others constantly complain, but they never do anything to change what they do not like, others always speak badly behind others’ backs.
Dale Partridge, creator of startupcamp.com and author of the book “People over profit” explains that there are 4 types of personalities that stop our success, whether as employees, leaders or entrepreneurs. According to Partridge, there is usually talk of what a business person should be like, however what if we better focus on how they shouldn’t be. Find below 4 types of personalities who never succeed in business:
1. He Who Never Finish What He Started.
These people are addicted to starting. They easily find the motivation to start a project but their desire to continue dies when they encounter the first obstacles. They love excuses and have 5 or 6 unfinished projects. Lack of discipline, persistence, and desire to see results quickly do not allow them to cross the finish line. Without discipline and persistence, you can never create a company.
2. The Selfish Partner.
Egoism is the worst enemy of society. These people are looking for partners that they can manipulate, they like worker bees that they can manage at their convenience. The idea of a partnership is to build a win-win relationship, however, this is not the intention of the selfish partner.
3. The Lying Executive.
In his quest to grow in the business world, this character will lie, cheat, and even be able to steal to achieve his goals. For some reason, he thinks that morality and business are not related. His response will always be “It is not personal, it is just business.” If you work with someone with these characteristics, be careful, you do not want to be involved in their game or seem their ally.
4. The Fearful Entrepreneur.
It is that person who does not take a step forward without being sure that he will not fail, his lack of faith leads him to never risk. Although they possess the skills and knowledge, they fear to lose, they are afraid of failing. This person has everything to change the world, but his fear ends his dreams without giving them the opportunity to make them come true.
Identifying these 4 types of people that you must remove from your life is only one of the steps to start your ascent to success. But it is a very important one!
We are not children and our decisions are more important than marshmallows, but many times we choose the first thing that is put on the plate.
We chose the first reaction and preferred to watch television and not do the most important thing; we get up late and don’t get up early; we choose a sedentary and not active life; simply because we do not have enough concentration to see that the prize that we will win for not being carried away by our impulses is much greater.
I hope that understanding delayed gratification brings a lot of success to your life.